Every New Year celebration means I’ve grown another year older and wiser. Here are a few thoughts I wish I could share with my younger self.  

Everything is going to be okay. No situation lasts forever, and many problems resolve themselves in time. Life does get better.

You deserve good things. No one deserves bad treatment, and you don’t have to tolerate abuse. Believe you should receive better and expect more from your life.

Trust your gut. When you feel uncomfortable or uneasy about a person or a situation, God is telling you to be careful. Listen to your spirit and know God is speaking to your heart.

When it’s time to go, move on. Too often we waste time clinging to roles or relationships that no longer serve our spirits or contribute to our growth. When you feel you’ve outgrown a station or a season, God may be prompting you to make a change and begin a new path.  

Everyone has their own problems. In our current culture, we often see only the surface of others’ lives, and everyone seems to be having more fun than we are. The truth is that everyone has experienced pain, and everyone needs compassion and understanding for whatever they are going through.  

Never “go along to get along.” Too many of us were taught to compromise our hearts and sacrifice our values in order to make others happy. If you are grimly tolerating a situation you know is wrong, either work to change it or accept it is not the right place for you.

Good relationships are built. The best relationships, friendships, and marriages don’t just happen. They require investments of commitment, work, time, and effort to make them successful.

Each person is responsible for his or her choices. We can’t blame others for our mistakes or bad behavior. We choose our actions and the people we want to become.

Reconsider your spending. All the material possessions we buy can’t really bring happiness.  All the clothes, shoes, jewelry, and books we purchase eventually became outgrown or outdated and get thrown away. Think carefully about how you spend your resources.

Invest in experience. The real reward of life is meaningful time shared with people who care. Don’t waste your time and money on things or people that don’t bring joy and value to your life. Focus on the positive and share your experience with people who strengthen and encourage you.

This New Year, I’m looking forward to a time of phenomenal productivity and change. I’m continuing to learn every day, and I’m excited about the lessons that wait in the days ahead.

What advice would you give a younger you? What are you looking forward to learning in 2019?

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Every year brings lessons and experiences that contribute to my growth and understanding. As 2018 draws to a close, I’m considering the events that happened this year and the lessons I have learned.

God sends us the people we need when we need them. I started attending a new church this year and immediately made awesome new friends who have enriched and blessed my life. I’ve taken time to connect with some old friends to strengthen and renew those relationships too. I’ve found that when I remain open and welcoming to new encounters, the people I need to meet find their way into my path.

Prayer has to be consistent and persistent. This year I completed the Let Prayer Change Your Life study by Becky Tirabassi. I learned that God wants me to talk with Him, and when I do, my relationship with Him grows.

I’m not perfect. This year I got two speeding tickets while driving through a particular neighborhood. I learned that though I try to be a generally good and law-abiding citizen, I am not immune to sin. I sometimes break the rules and need a penalty to remind me that I still screw up.

I’m not as smart as I think I am. This year I had an embarrassing experience that involved sending an email to the wrong address and then having to admit my mistake. I felt stupid, and I learned that sometimes I need the experience of public humility to remind me I’m not as extraordinary as I pretend to be.

Mindfulness increases discipline. For a few years I have struggled with food and weight issues, so this year I took positive steps to reverse my bad eating habits. I am learning that behaving mindfully helps me make the decisions I need to reach my goals.

It’s a long walk to the top. “Slow and steady wins the race,” I told my nephew as I held his hand and struggled to hike up the side of Crazy Horse Monument. “Did you ever read The Tortoise and the Hare?” All journeys take time, and I am continuing to learn that when we look upward and keep moving, we will eventually reach our destination.

Appreciate all you have. I have been blessed with a soft bed, a warm fire, people who love me, and a food bowl that’s filled regularly. I am always learning that when I am content and grateful, I feel richly rewarded.

Try something new. In October a friend invited me to an event in a neighborhood where I don’t usually travel. I was a little apprehensive about journeying into an unknown area, but the show was great and we had a good time. I learned that sometimes when we venture into unfamiliar territory, we discover that new experience is its own reward.

I am looking forward to the new experiences and discoveries that lie ahead in 2019. I am expecting many changes and new developments in the next year, and I’m excited about learning all the lessons that 2019 holds. I pray you enjoy a happy new year and many blessings in the year ahead.

What did you learn in 2018? What are you looking forward to as we approach the new year?Facebooktwittergoogle_pluspinterestlinkedinmail

Fall is the time of change and transformation. In fall the days grow shorter, shadows darken, trees go bare. It is the time of preparing for the deep rest of winter and the regrowth of spring; the season of gathering in what we have grown, examining what we need to move forward, and establishing our priorities for pursuing what is to come.

This fall has been a particularly busy time for me. I am establishing new relationships and looking forward to new developments on my path. I am preparing for an expected season of growth in the spring ahead.

Throughout this fall and winter, I will be making significant changes to this website and blog. I hope to extend my reach further and speak to a wider audience.

Please be patient as I explore what all these changes mean to these pages. I pray you will continue to check in here often, and that we will soon be able to connect and communicate in more effective ways. Thank you for reading Howtobeasinglemom.com, and I pray you receive many blessings today.

What are you looking forward to changing this fall? What do you hope will develop in the months ahead?Facebooktwittergoogle_pluspinterestlinkedinmail

September 1st approaches, the time I always think of as the real New Year. School terms are starting. Church programs begin. We buy fresh clothes, shoes, pencils, and backpacks. We adjust to changing schedules and expectations. Fall is a busy time, a final flurry of activity before the holidays and then settling in for a long winter’s rest.

Each season promises an exciting new beginning. Every new start gives an opportunity to learn and grow. A change in the weather brings a chance for building friendships and exploring ideas.

This September I pray you welcome the new season. I hope you receive the inspiration and experiences to propel you into a time of expansive growth and understanding. Know God is with you always, through every season of your year.

What are you looking forward to this fall? How do you greet the start of a different season?Facebooktwittergoogle_pluspinterestlinkedinmail

Months ago I planted this scrubby shrub in a pot on my patio. What grew up from the soil is this towering, thick-stemmed mystery, which we’ve named “The Beanstalk.” It has wide and round, velvety leaves, dainty yellow flowers, and round green fruit that has yet to mature. I suspect my neighborhood squirrel left behind a forgotten seed; but I have no idea what it is, and I won’t know until the fruit reveals itself. Meanwhile, I faithfully tend the growing plant. I wait and water, watch and wonder, eagerly anticipating the day the fruit will ripen.

A life of faith is like this flowerpot. We never know what will grow from the seeds we have planted. We take an action, make a decision, or join a conversation with no way of knowing what will develop from our efforts or what the conclusion will be. Often we begin a season looking forward to one outcome, only to discover something completely unexpected growing in its place. We may be surprised by what we harvest at the end of a growing season, but God always knows the potential that lies beneath the surface.

 “So you do not know the works of God who makes everything. In the morning sow your seed, And in the evening do not withhold your hand; For you do not know which will prosper, Either this or that, Or whether both alike will be good” (Ecclesiastes 11:5-6).

While we wait to see what blooms, our purpose is to faithfully tend the garden we have started. We continue to nurture relationships, take actions, serve others, and pray constantly. We can eagerly anticipate the day we see what blossoms from our efforts, and we can be confident that when God gives the increase, whatever grows will be good.

This season, I pray you are faithfully tending the seeds you have planted. Know that your work will be rewarded with a rich and bountiful harvest.

What are you hoping will grow in this season? How do you know God will give the increase?Facebooktwittergoogle_pluspinterestlinkedinmail